Pickup Lines for the Dork in all of us.

Found this on Facebook. If you are not a Facebookaholic or are going through FBAA (Facebookaholic Anonymous), then we’ll help you out. I highlighted the good ones.

  1. You’re like an exothermic reaction, you spread your hotness everywhere!
  2. I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves
  3. You’re like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life!
  4. If i was an enzyme, i’d be helicase so i could unzip your genes
  5. I’m attracted to you so strongly, scientists will have to develop a fifth fundamental force.
  6. Baby, you overclock my processor.
  7. Be my queen and mate me with your knight moves.
  8. Baby, you make my floppy disk turn into a hard drive
  9. You make me want to calibrate my joystick without the latest drivers
  10. You defragment my life
  11. Do you think we can make it a step more serious and disable network sharing?
  12. You must be auxin, cuz u r causing me to have rapid stem elongation.
  13. Baby, let me find your nth term
  14. I don’t have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?
  15. Baby i’ll treat you like my hw- I’ll slam you on the table and do you all night long
  16. Hey baby, can i see what’s under your radical?
  17. If I were an integral, I’d fill you up.
  18. You must be calcium bicarbonate, because if you let me get you wet, then the reaction will be explosive.
  19. I think my heart just lagged.
    (*NOTE – We at Dorkazine think it should be “I think my heart just Defraged”)
  20. I wish I were your second derivative so i could fill your concavities.
  21. Did you just combust?? Because you’re HOT!
  22. By looking at you I can tell you’re 36-25-36, which by the way are all perfect squares.
  23. It doesn’t take a genius to see how gorgeous you are, but if it did, I would be overqualified.
  24. Baby, if you were words on a page, you’d be what they call FINE PRINT!
  25. What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs and multiply
  26. Baby, you’re a 9.999999999…but you’d be a 10 if you were with me.
  27. Baby, everytime i see you, my cardiovascular system gets all worked up
  28. I wish I were adenine because then I could get paired with U.
  29. What’s your sine? The sine^(-1) of you must be pi/2 cause you’re the one
  30. If my right leg was christmas and my left was Easter, would you like to spend some time between the holidays?
  31. You have nicer legs than an Isosceles right triangle.
  32. Your so cute you make my zygomaticus muscles contract. (Muscles that make you smile)
  33. When you and me get together it’s like superposition of 2 waves in phase.
  34. Want to meet up so I can excite your natural frequency?
  35. If I was sin^2 theta and you were cos^2 theta together we would be 1
  36. You know.. it’s not the length of the vector that counts… it’s how you apply the force
  37. If I move my lips half the distance to yours… and then half again… and again… etc…. would they ever meet? no? Well in this specific case i am going to disprove your assumption.
  38. Your name is Leslie? Look, I can spell your name on my calculator!
  39. If i was an endoplasmic reticulum, how would you want me: smooth or rough?
  40. I wish I was an Ion so I could form an exothermic bond with you.
  41. If my right leg is the cell wall and my left the membrane, do you want to be the cytoplasm?
  42. Our love is like dividing by zero…. you cannot define it
  43. Lets meet somewhere… you bring your beaker and I’ll bring my stirring rod
  44. Baby let me be your integral so I can be the area under your curves
  45. Hey baby, what’s your tanx cosx?
  46. Lets get together and test the spring potential of my matress
  47. Let’s discover our coefficient of friction
  48. Baby, you’re so gneiss I’ll never take you for granite.
  49. I less than three you….. (i < 3 you)
  50. I heard you’re sin because you’re always on top when we make tangent
  51. You be Flourine and I’ll be Francium and maybe later I can give you an electron
  52. My sudden protracted cardiac arrhythmia tells me I love you
  53. Whoops, I think my binomials just expanded
  54. I must be the Sun and you must be Earth, cause the closer we get, the hotter you become.
  55. Baby I wish I could live on a [integral of 1/cabin d cabin] with you.
  56. Excuse me, ma’am, but can I get your seven significant digits?
  57. I’m overheating because you’re stuck in my head like an infinite loop.
  58. You must be chlorine cause you are polarizing my bond!
  59. Baby if you let your acid react with my base, you can count on getting 100 MOLES of my water and salt
  60. i’ll be the one over your cosx an baby, we can have secx!
  61. Would you like to enjoy my laptop, I promise I don’t have any viruses…
  62. I’m relativistic: the faster I go, the longer I last.
  63. That dress would look better accelerating towards the floor at 9.8 m/s/s
  64. I’m a star. Wanna taste the Milky Way?
  65. I’m attracted to you like the Earth is attracted to the Sun-with a large force inversely proportional to the distance squared.
  66. YouTube Myspace and I’ll Google your Yahoo
  67. I wanna stick to u like glue-cose
  68. Baby, I can feel an attraction between you and me, and it’s more than just our universal gravitation…
  69. I’ll “eye” your pod! icon wink Pickup Lines for the Dork in all of us.
  70. B equals T x N. I think you and I should study the T and N planes in depthT and N = osculating plane, which literally means the ‘kissing’ plane.
  71. If I could rearrange the periodic table, I’d put Uranium and Iodine together. (Uraniums symbol is U and Iodines symbol is I)
  72. Baby, we’ve got chemistry together… next period.
  73. At absolute zero, you would still move me.
  74. Hey baby, your Body and Love waves are rocking my bedding
  75. How about we make like the change of base law, with you on the bottom, and me on top?
  76. Baby if you were a 6 I would want to be your (reflection about the x-axis + then reflection about the y-axis) –>9
  77. Hey baby if i supply the voltage and you a little resistance, imagine the current we can make together. (V=IR => (V/R)=I)
  78. Baby stop with diet coke, you’ve got plenty of ASSpertame
  79. Yo baby, you want to see me solve a quadratic?
  80. Baby, lim (u->me) ? e^x = f(u)^n.
  81. On a scale of 1-10, you’re a solid e to the power of pi
  82. I think that convex butts are ALWAYS better than concave butts..you look toned
  83. I wish I was your secant line so I could touch you in at least two places!
  84. Baby ill be your asymptotes so i can shape your curves…
  85. Would you like to see the exponential growth of my natural log?
  86. If you were a graphics calculator, i’d look at your curves all day long!
  87. Question: Wanna integrate my natural log? Answer: I’ll have to be one over first…
  88. hey girl, let’s get together and figure out our heat of fusion
  89. it’s a good thing you’ve got evaporative cooling, cause i’m gonna make you sweat
  90. hey baby, lets figure out the torque of your mass on my rod
  91. baby i just drew a pic of you on my ti83 but ur sooo hot my screen melted
  92. The way the light reflects off the angles of your head is extremely enchanting.
  93. in Old English: Ich grethe Þae, maec Cwen.(I greet you, my Queen)
  94. I don’t know if you’re in my range, but I’d sure like to take you home to my domain.
  95. Hey baby. Want to squeeze my theorem while I poly your nomial?
  96. Hey baby, I’m like a rubix cube. THe more you play with me, the harder I get.
  97. You’re so hot, you must be the cause for global warming.
  98. Since distance equals velocity times time, let’s let velocity or time approach infinity, because I want to go all the way with you.
  99. Your body has the nicest arc length I’ve ever seen.”
  100. I hope you know set theory because I want to intersect you and union you.
  101. You and I would add up better than a Riemann sum.
  102. Can I be the phasor to your electron and take you to an excited state?
  103. Let’s make like a transcription factor and response element and turn things on.
  104. If I were a Shwann cell, I’d squeeze areound your axon and give you a fast action potential.
  105. You must be an asymptote, because I just find myself getting closer and closer to you.
  106. You’re as sweet at 3.14.
  107. You must be massive because I’m attracted to you.
  108. I won’t stop bugging you until I get the address to your home page!
  109. You fascinate me more than the fundamental theorem of calculus.
  110. My love for you is like a concave function’s positive first derivative, because it’s always increasing.
  111. Let’s convert our potential energy to kinetic energy.
  112. Why don’t we measure the coefficient of static friction between me and you?
  113. You’re hotter than a bunsen burner set to full power!
  114. Baby, together U and I make uranium iodide (UI3)
  115. If I were an assembly language, I’d jump to your address, shift right a bit, push it in, pop it out, load a byte into your accumulator, then jump if you’re negative.
  116. In Euclidean geometry two parallel lines never touch … let’s go back to my place and study some non-Euclidean geometry.
  117. My vector has a really large magnitude. Would you care to normalize it?
  118. Roses are #FF0000, violets are #0000FF. All my base are belong to you.
  119. I 1-sin(theta) you.
  120. You and I must have the same natural frequency, because we resonate together.
  121. The surface of my cylinder is not a compact metric space.
  122. Most women are so complex. They’re always like “i! i! i!” But you – you’re just so real. (Note: i! does not mean i factorial.)
  123. My love for you is like the slope of a concave up function because it’s always increasing.
  124. Can I plug my solution into your equation?
  125. The volume of a general cylinder was known for thousands of years, but you won
  126. i want to go through your every procedure, Do your Loops, and program your Booleans
  127. I wish I were a predicate so I could be the direct object of your affection.
  128. I think if you and i had Hex we’d be a perfect OA
  129. Can I bombard your singularity with my rocket ship until you supernova?
  130. you are the log(base 10) 10^1…
  131. Let’s work out our orbicularis oris muscles together! orbicularis oris = kissing muscles
  132. I’ve been secant you for a long time
  133. The direction fields of my heart all point to you
  134. Want to be my substrate/enzyme?
  135. You have 206 bones in your body… want one more?
  136. Chem students do it on the table periodically
  137. If you let me work hard enough, I can give you a dipole moment
  138. I love you like an unspoken metaphor. That’s why I had to use a simile.
  139. Instead of being the derivative, id much rather be the secant so i can touch u not only once, but twice
  140. Lets make love like pi; irrational and never ending
  141. baby lets measure the amplitude of our physical wave
  142. baby you’re the basis of my mind. no matter what i think of, it all comes back to you
  143. Maybe later we can go over to my place and titrate until you reach your end-point…
  144. Baby, you must be a start codon because you are turning me on.
  145. Wanna alkylate my alkoxide? It’s nucleophilic and ready to backside attack the halogen out of you.
  146. The word of the day is “Legs”, lets go back to my place and spread the word
  147. Baby, you must be a pile of dinosaur bones, cause I dig you!
  148. Baby, you’re body is like a hyperbola
  149. Baby, you’re like a pendulum… you’ll only stop when I damp you
  150. Are you the square root of 2? because I feel irrational when I’m around you
  151. Being with you is like switching to polar coordinates: complex and imaginary things now have a magnitude and direction.
  152. Our love is more perfect than 6.(Six is the first perfect number)
  153. You can put a Trojan on my Hard Drive anytime
  154. Baby you must be a modulus sign, ‘cos whenever you wrap your arms round me i always feel positive!
  155. Baby, I’m like an oceanic plate on a gravity slide – I can’t wait to subduct beneath your crust!
  156. You’re so hot you denature my proteins
  157. Baby you know this sh*t isn’t USB2.0..it’s firewire!
  158. Let’s just cut to the chase, I wanna hotsync your PDA.
  159. Nobody turns me on from a cold boot like you.
  160. Don’t worry honey, they call it my dual-channel RAM.
  161. If you were Anatomy, then I’d be Physiology because they always go together!
  162. Want to make the Cold War hot?
  163. My court packing plan isn’t my only packing plan…
  164. Want to play War of 1812? I’ll light your White House on fire…
  165. There’s a reason they say I started the Era of Good Feelings…
  166. Can I annex your territory after class?
  167. Do you want to help me with my project on the tit- I’m sorry, TET Offensive?
  168. I’ll be your Secretary of the Interior…
  169. I bet if Jefferson had met you, he would have vetoed the Non-Intercourse Act.
  170. Want to go back to my place and discuss Big Stick Diplomacy?
  171. Want to reenact the Battle of the Bulge?
  172. Hey, up for some high-energy quantum tunnelling tonight?
  173. If you were a concentration gradient I’d go down on you
  174. Girl whenever I am near you, I undergo anaerobic respiration because you take my breath away
  175. If you were C6, and i were H12, all we would need is the air we breathe to be sweeter than sugar…
  176. we’ve been differentiating for too long, lets sum it up and integrate
  177. you and i add up better than a riemann sum
  178. my love for you is a monotonically increasing unbounded function
  179. Your beauty defies real and complex analysis.
  180. Your hottness is the only reason we can’t reach absolute zero.
  181. I use my rod of infinite length for more than just simplifying calculations…
  182. You must be a magnetic monopole because all i get from you is attraction
  183. My love for you is like pi, it’s never-ending.
  184. I wish we were in telophase, cause then I could admire your cleavage.”
  185. Let’s make our slopes zero (slope of zero means horizontal => bed)
  186. baby you must be O2 cuz i m about to combust all over you
  187. I just bought a molecular model kit, want to play with my stick and balls?
  188. ?-1) 2-2sin? ?du
    ?-1) = i
    2-2sin? = cardiod graph (heart)
    ?du = u
  189. Forget hydrogen you’re my number one element
  190. You’re cute, I’m cute, together we’re 2cute!
  191. you are like a proton in my core–without you i could never be the same.
  192. Hey baby, wanna form a synapse with me and exchange neurotransmitters?
  193. Baby, if you were oceanic crust and I was a continent, I’d let you subduct so we can make hot hot magma.
  194. I do believe I am your reciprocal; we will be one when we multiply.
  195. Hey baby, wanna form a zygote?
  196. If I’m the Riemann zeta function, you must be s=1.
  197. You’re a moving electric charge, and I’m a moving magnetic charge… Wanna flux?
  198. If I toss a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
  199. hey baby, do you need an anatomy tutor? They say i’m the best because i prefer to use a more HANDS-ON approach.
  200. Baby, if they made you in Java, you’d be the object of my desire.
  201. Baby, if they made you in C, you would have a pointer to my heart.
  202. Baby, if they made you in Haskell, it would infer that you were just my type.
  203. You’re like a Universal Turing Machine; you’re the only one that I’ll ever need.
  204. Like a quantum computation, our paths are entangled.
  205. You’re like an NP-hard problem of significant size; I could spend the rest of my life with you.
  206. If I could program the universe, I would allocate you and I in contiguous memory blocks.
  207. If I was an operating system, your process would have top priority.
  208. Like a graph with n^2 edges, you complete me.
  209. Are you a non volitaile particle? Because you raise my boiling point.
  210. If I went binary, you would be the 1 for me.
  211. my hypothalamus must be secreting serotonin because baby, i want you!
  212. i’m sine and you’re cosine, wanna make like a tangent?
  213. I sure hope our coefficient of restitution is 0, ‘cos when we make contact i never want to part!
  214. My love is like communism; everyone gets a share, and it’s only good in theory.
  215. You + Me = The number of sides in a Mobius Strip
  216. Hey baby, let’s make a stress-strain curve together.
  217. I don’t need neurons to stimulate your sensory system.
  218. Let ‘u’ and ‘i’ be irrational integers such that a real non-monotonic relationship exists for all T = {0 … infinity}
  219. you must be absolute, because every time you’re around me, i feel positive
  220. Hey baby, can I be your enzyme? because my active site is dying for a chemical reaction.
  221. Why don’t you remove those barriers to imports? It will ease my inflation and the benefits will trickle down.
  222. how about you Palmitoylate my protein, so i can drive it into your lipid raft.
  223. baby, i’m gonna break you like a large non-polar substance breaks a phospholipid bilayer!
  224. what say we slip between my beta-pleated sheets and you get to know my alpha-helix?
  225. I couldn’t help but notice your impressive cleavage furrow…
  226. let’s exchange plasmids – my pilus is huge.
  227. baby, if you let me pump my H+ ions into your intermembrane space, it would induce a massive conformational change in my f1 complex.
  228. Baby, if you were oceanic crust and I was a continent, I’d let you subduct so we can make hot hot magma.
  229. Hey baby, let’s vasodiolate!
  230. I’d be the photon to your electron and take you to an excited state.
  231. You must be sin squared, because I’m cosin squared and together we equal one.
  232. Baby can u oil up my geering system while I use my rack-and-pinion steering?
  233. Hey baby, I’m a power source, and you’re the kind of resistor i’d like to deliver my load to.
  234. Baby, let’s configure our hard drives in master and slave position.
  235. Hey baby, lets turn off our firewalls and connect our Ethernet cable.
  236. Babe, you take the ‘C’ out of sec(xy)
  237. Let’s fool the physicists and avoid our least actions for the night
  238. Ill be the naked singularity. You be the black hole.
  239. Baby, let’s stone and weierstrass till our epsilons touch
  240. I want us to be like the discrete metric

About Jeffrey Powers - @geekazine

I am a podcaster and V-Caster. I love to go out and talk tech with anyone. I enjoy talking with startups because they have new and innovative technologies. You can find Geekazine at Google+ and me at my page. I also have shows at Day in Tech History, iPad365, This Week in Google Glass and a Podcast Coach at How to Record Podcasts. You can also sign up for a Helpout